Love languages officially updated to include reformer pilates

Pilates lovers everywhere are feeling validated this week as reformer pilates has officially become recognised as a modern love language. The 5 love languages, introduced in 1992 by Dr. Gary Chapman, have long been a major part of romance and relationship discourse, but have been shaken up by the explosive popularity rise of reformer pilates in women.

Fire hydrant fanatic Hannah, 26, revealed to MAANT that she feels as though her long term boyfriend is now third wheeling her relationship with pilates.

“Catch ups with the girls? Pilates. After work socialising? Pilates. An excuse to buy overpriced and unsupportive activewear? Pilates. It’s honestly become a personality trait for me,” she tells reporter Lu Tealphase.

MAANT can reveal the other things in contention for love language recognition were Diet Coke, robot vacuum cleaners, and trash reality television.